Kurt Cobain was well-known to his friends and admirers for having mental health problems in addition to his well-known drug addiction. Because of all of these, the singer had suicidal thoughts and made several attempts at taking his own life. He was taken to the hospital right away, treated for five days, then discharged, went back to his house, and checked himself into rehab.
Sadly, Cobain broke out of the rehab facility, took a cab to LAX Airport, and returned to Seattle by plane. On April 8, 1994, an electrician found the rocker’s body at home while everyone else was searching for him. Subsequently, it was disclosed that the lead singer of Nirvana, who was 27 at the time, had shot himself on April 5 with a shotgun, and that his blood contained heroin. Several aspects of the singer’s suicide note require further investigation. It was later verified to be written in his handwriting.
Kurt Cobain Mentioned Freddie Mercury In His Suicide Note
In his suicide note, Cobain expressed primary distress over the absence of the thrill he once derived from creating music. Kurt addressed the note to Boddah, his childhood imaginary friend. He seemed to have no other means of communication with the outside world than music. His lack of fulfillment made him lose all desire to live.
It seems that the performer no longer experienced the same excitement as before when he exited the stage following a live show. Cobain used Freddie Mercury as a comparison for his predicament because the Queen singer always appreciated the crowd’s support. Moreover, the frontman of Nirvana acknowledged that he was envious of Mercury’s inspiration from the crowd. The lack of rush so severely damaged his mental state that he eventually committed suicide.
The text that mentions Freddie Mercury is as follows:
“Freddie Mercury seemed to love and relish in the love and adoration from the crowd, which is something I admire and envy. However, when the lights go out backstage, it doesn’t affect me. The manic roar of the crowds begins, but it doesn’t have the same impact as it did for Freddie Mercury.
The fact is, I can’t fool you, any one of you. It simply isn’t fair to you or me. The worst crime I can think of would be to rip people off by faking it and pretending as if I’m having 100% fun. Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk out on stage. I’ve tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do, God, believe me, I do, but it’s not enough).”
Kurt Cobain was suffering from not being able to enjoy music, the most significant aspect of his life. However, there must have been a myriad of reasons for his decision to take his own life. In his note, Cobain stated that he envied Freddie Mercury, the greatest musician. Mercury could truly enjoy performing since Cobain felt unable to fake being happy both on and off stage.
Whatever his excuse, his admirers are still grieving the loss of one of the greatest artists in rock history. Ironically, they are grateful for his death note, which gives them a glimpse into Cobain’s past.
You can read Kurt Cobain’s suicide note below.
